Be Yourself

Be yourself. Be authentic. That’s what I say when advising clients on how to communicate. Perhaps that’s the journalist in me talking, the one whose bullshit radar has been tested one too many times. I stand by my advice. If you want people to listen to you and hear you, be yourself.

Then why am I reading article after article about ‘listicles’ and writing to help your readers. I even tried to write one!

I am told by people who write for a living that no one wants to read about us - that’s you, me, and anyone else who may want to tell a story. Instead, what people want to read are tips to make their lives better. As if reading lists on how to make to-do lists have more value than, say, a hug.

The same people who swear by listicles also remind us to ever be so savvy on social media. Post only at certain times, the advice goes, and engage with the community - regardless of whether you know them or have anything to say.

So, in addition to writing listicles, we should also commit valuable waking hours to checking likes, posting high-angle selfies, and checking again.

The so-called experts of today’s ‘real world’ - millenials, influencers, whoevers - are essentially advising us to always be in performance mode. As authentically as possible.

I can see why true authenticity would be a challenge. The ‘beauty’ option in some of our phone cameras smooths out lines and brighten complexions. Fake eyelashes used to be for costume parties or Halloween. Today, even teenagers wear them, and you can get them semi-permanently attached on your real ones.

And while social media pretends to record our impromptu thoughts, in actuality each post can be edited ad nauseum. How many times have I retrieved a post that I feel needs some copy editing? Too many times. These posts are not ad-hoc. Rather, they can compel ha-voc.

The editing is in the post preparation too. Some ‘experts’ even say that a good Instagram should take at least an hour to prepare, starting from conceptualization to execution. Clearly my attempts to center my meal into the middle of the frame is amateur hour. Yet even those two seconds of iphoneagraphy are already two seconds too long for my son. “Food is for eating, mom.”

That’s good, authentic advice.